Bachelor Re-Cap {Juan Pablo Episode 3}

Cassandra is a little vanilla. 
If you know what I mean.

And young. 22? maybe if my math is right.

I want that car/boat experience. How fun.
And let's be honest it is impossible to be in a lake/ocean/pool
without touching the bottom and be able to hold each other up to hug.
At least Juan Pablo was smart enought to swim to the car to hold on to kiss her!

There goes Mama Renee taking care of everyone in the house.
That person is usually always the fan favorite but not necessarily the bachelor's favorite.
That makes me sad. Maybe Juan Pablo will prove me wrong.

'Dinner at my house.' 
Well really it isn't YOUR house but I let it slide since your dang accents is so cute!

She really does need to loosen up. Her (young) age is showing.
Well she loosened up her hips at least dancing!
I still say vanilla. 

Her malted milk ball mouth full comment
with him following trying to say malted milk ball..
exactly why we love Juan Pablo.

I though he was sending her home.
He just said...she needs to focus on her son.
WHAT?! she got a rose. yay.
Vanilla and all...she is sweet and he likes her.


Sharleen just looks like she has a stick stuck up her bleep...

They showed a preview of a girl getting slammed in the head during the soccer game.
I hope it is Stick up her Butt girl.

Juan Pablo....'Kelly we need to work on you.'

Oh it was Sharleen who got nailed. Good for her for being a good sport.
And then she takes one to her boob from JP.
And even though I just abbreviated his name.
Please dont read it JP, please still read Juan Pablo with
a heavy HUUUU at the beginning.

I'm not loving any of the girls' dresses on the evening part of this date.
Yes Nikki you should have stolen a kiss.
But...i have a hunch he will kiss a lot of girls tonight and you just
might stand out for NOT kissing him!

And there he goes kissing Andi in the kitchen.
Which I approve of.

Elise...you didn't get a date because he knows he likes you.

So he isn't kissing all the girls.
I like that he is taking them to special spots and that none of the girls 
are trying to interrupt him.

And Sharleen just dummied down her style with a 'Cache' looking dress.
I kind of liked her by the end of the soccer game
but I'm sure that will change after this little one on one time with him.

Ewww...she is an awkward kisser. Tring to play all coy. Yuck.
And even when she asked for a do-over it sucked.
And she admitted to being a tease.
Why do the guys always go for the girl everyone hates.

YAY....I told you Nikki....the genuine friendship first always pay off.
Good girl for the win.

And Sharleen's comment after Nikki gets the rose shows this is a game for her.

That man seriously takes into consideration all these girls' feelings.
Checking in with Elise first.

Chelsie tone down the head shake to the music.

Oh Elise quit trying to validate why you didn't get the date.
Focus on yourself sweetheart. And if you weren't worried or scared
you wouldn't be talking about it.

I can't believe they just ate all that food and then are going to jump.
I'd barf for sure.
Oh don't pretend like you don't know what is coming!

Who looks that cute in a helmet?
Chelsie does.
the cars honking all around me would terrify me.

'holy holy macaroni' {insert accent}
It's ok. It's ok. I'm here. Trust me.
I just met you but trust me!

He is being so sweet and protective.
And patient.
It's a once in a lifetime chance for most people.
Just jump.
Just make up your mind girlfriend!
Everyone else is getting impatient.

And they did the upside down spiderman kiss for their first kiss.

Haven't these girls figured out that each date is going to be crazy romantic...
like out of a movie scene romantic!

I'm not sure about Chelsie's dance moves.
And not alot of passion yet seen between them.

Oh no...the sneak surprise in the morning.
He is cooking for them. 
One of those girls has to smell the food.

Oh Kelly...not a great impression.
Hiding your face.

Yes for mama renee and no teeth brushing even.
He loved that.

All those girls in their cute pjs and then there is Stick up her Butt
in a long robe. ROBE? What? 

Pool Party!
Oh Kelly...aka potty mouth.
I hope for the girls tell all night they do a montage of all your one-liners.
You look like a WHORE. 

Hello Sharleen.
If he is having fun in a pool...I'd at least enjoy the sun!
I will give Sharleen that...a girl's just got to cry once in awhile.
And Juan Pablo agrees you have to let it out.
Love him again.
I have a man like that too. Understands a girl needs to just cry sometimes.

Clare, no need to worry...he thought you looked the cutest in your jammies.
Oh I'm glad he told her...yes...fresh out of bed.
That's the best!

I'm still not sure who a few of the brunettes are in the group.
I tink there is enough drama in the house now with Sharleen that he
can let Flowerpants go home. She was around for excitement.

Based on how they are standing in the rose ceremony...I'm guessing the last two girls will be 
Lucy and Danielle.
Who is Alison?
oh actually the final 3 aren't standing together...there goes my theory.
So Lucy and the blonde...who I'm not sure who she is either.

Um Lucy...not everyone there is going to find what they are looking for.
Only two...Juan Pablo and the girl he chooses!

And looks like Sharleen isn't going to be the only girl that the house doesn't like.
Bring it girls.


  1. I almost texted you in the middle of the episode with an alert that Kaia would NOT like Sharleen's dress this week. Who would? And the world's most awkward "kiss". Ever.

  2. I love your recaps - you crack me up my friend...always! :)

  3. I am thoroughly enjoying this season and your recaps make it even better. I'm going to go out on a limb here...and tell you....I kinda like Sharleen. I totally get that she isn't making a great impression. However....I feel a bit of a "kindred" with her. She made a harsh first judgment (I am guilty at times) but then realized she was acting like she had a stick up her butt and decided to try and enjoy the experience a bit. AND...the more you hang with Huuuuuujuan, the more appealing he becomes. He's showing very good "all around good peeps" characteristics thus far. And I'm digging it. I didn't expect to, I'll admit, but I'm digging him.


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