Of Course You Are Going To Get Attached. {My Life}

{waving good-bye to daddy in the morning}

The number one thing I hear almost every.single.time I tell people that we are foster parents is...

'OH, I could never do that. I would get SO attached.'

well duh. that is what you are suppose to do.

I usually respond kindly with something to the like of....
'Actually really good foster training prepares you for heartbreak.
We are in the business of getting our hearts broken but that is exactly what these children need.
We know what our job is...and that is to put our heart on the line.
To provide love and safety for these children.
And to encourage reunification with the family when and if at all possible.'

They are as much a gift to us as we are to them right now.

I sometimes get offended by the 'I would get too attached' comment.
I think....
'then what kind of people do you think we are....cold, hard, callous people that 
bring children into our home and put a wall up and don't get attached?' 

I would never say that to them...it's too snarky for me 
but sometimes I look at them somewhat quizzical and think it!

Best job I've ever had....hands down.
And I don't even consider it a job.
These babies are part of our family for now.
They have been for the past almost 18 months.

A lot of times I drop the 'foster' part because they just feel like
part of the family.

Oh we are ALL attached. All six of us.
To each other.

Exactly how it should be right now.


  1. This is beautiful April...and that photo. Heart melting.

  2. OMG those littles are scrumptious. Such a great post and beautiful photo. Well Duh....who wouldn't get attached? Spot on my friend! XO

  3. Yes!!!! You took the words out of my mouth girl.

  4. Wow! You are so right, and you say it so well. Thank you for a beautiful post!

  5. It's always good for people to voice the "other way of looking at it" angle because sometimes? People just don't think of the "other angle" before they speak. Some might and just be heartless, but some might be like me. I know my weakness and in contrast, whenever I think a thought like this, I cannot fathom the strength that people like your family truly LIVE every single day. It's certainly not that I think you're "cool-hearted" enough to let them go should that day come, but that you're strong enough to love them so much and be able to recognize you must let go when your time is over to reunite them. Your family plays a role in our society that is vastly needed, and you do it splendidly.

  6. Well put! I love this post! We adopted my baby girl at birth, and though I realize that is quite different - I can relate to stinging words. Like "real mom" and "given up". I hope to become a foster parent as well someday, but I need my husband to feel like I do to proceed with that. It isn't fair to the children to have only one of the parents in the foster home willing to have their heart broken. My heart goes out to you and your lovely littles.

  7. I just had my foster girls reunite with their families after a year in my home. I couldn't put it in better words.

  8. I just heard a pastor say that love is supposed to be painful. For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son. Ultimate example of love being painful.

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