7.19.2011

Dear Dave + April....A Tuesday Series.


Dear Dave,
It's been a doozy of a week. I mean, you know it's bad when world war 3 started in our home Sunday afternoon because I was late to Sunday School meeting because of socializing. I totally get your point of view....it's rude to be late to a class....but after almost 17 years of marriage I thought you knew what a social butterfly I was. I can't help it. I really am sorry. As much as I love chatting with you, I do love catching up with friends once a week at church too. And, honestly, I really didn't know that it bothered you that much to walk into Sunday School class without me. What came out of our WW3 was that we both don't like to be parented by each other. I mean...we've earned this title of parenting, but who at 40 wants to still be parented? So how do we help improve each others short comings in a softer kinder matter? Because even though I firmly believe that the idea of changing someone might be taboo, I do firmly believe that we should help bring out the best in each other and help each other improve.

I do love that we are exercising sweetness and controlled voices while trying to get ready for QBM and leaving on vacation. It is always so stressful and I love that I can feel you trying to attack it positively. I also love that we spend our anniversary with our children each year at our favorite place....the beach! Notice, I said 'our'. I do love the beach almost as much as you do now. Thank you for teaching me that! Speaking of 'improving'. Remember when you would come to pick me up for the beach when we were dating...my hair would be curled, I'd be fully dressed with belt and boots and my make-up done perfectly. I remember you scratching your head while saying 'ummm...we are going to the beach...." Don't worry, I've only packed appropriate beach attire for this trip.

Also, I just need to ask one more thing. I need you to be extra tender with me these next couple of weeks. My mind has been so busy thinking about this time last year. Spending so much time with my brother during his final months. I've been living the past few weeks remembering the good, the tough and the funnies. I'm looking forward to being on the beach in San Clemente on the one year anniversary of his return home to heaven. Can we go to the Pier? Would you mind sitting in that same spot with me? And, being OK if I cry again there? Maybe I'll even go back into the ocean to play in the waves like we were doing when we received that phone call. Would you carry me out since I hate my feet touching the bottom of the ocean?

I really am looking forward to our vacation in a couple of days....for lots of different reasons.

love, april

p.s. you owe me a letter!

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4 comments:

  1. April, I'm thinking of you - I think I really "got to know you" and love your blog at this time. I remember how sweet that post was, your tender words about your brother and how honest and candid you were. I know Dave was with you then and he'll be there again this year. This post was lovely for so many reasons. Thanks again for keeping it real.

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  2. oh man. I knew I should have read this yesterday. I am a mess now. What a sweet letter. Dave, please tell me you will carry her out in those waves...and Dave, please tell me you have pictures of April with hair curled and all decked out for the beach!!!!!!!!!

    Have a great vacation!

    paige

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  3. Sweet... I hope you have a lovely time! Thanks for the encouragement to keep pursuing gentleness and grace with our spouse.

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  4. What a sweet post. It's so encouraging to read these posts. Please keep them up. And here's to hoping you can relive some of those moments (the good ones) of the memory of your brother. I can't imagine how hard that was\is. Bless your heart.

    XO,
    Annie

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