6.21.2011

Dear Dave + April....a Tuesday Series


{we write letters each week to each other to enrich our marriage. we've come a long way. check out the full series on the sidebar on the right.}

Dear Ape,
So here we are another week and have kind of settled into a groove. Work, work, work, kids, work, then a few moments of "us" time. I really love the few moments we can have together even when we have to lock our bedroom door and ask the kids to give us just 5 minutes to catch up on all the days happenings. I think those 5 or so minutes are very important to being involved in each others lives. Many times we get caught up in what is going on around us and what is happening at work that we don't take time for us and it needs to happen. So thanks for making it happen. I read your blog when you were away last week and you said that you hummed a certain song all week, it made me think of a song that I think about sometimes. I remember we had bought a random CD with all kinds of different music on it in Walnut Creek. We were driving home and this song came on. We listened and had a long discussion about how people fall into ruts and drift apart. Do you remember? I love how these two people found out interesting things about each other after they thought their relationship was over. Ring a bell? Anyway it is a cheesy song from the 70's I think. It's called Escape or "the pina coloda song".

When you were gone I thought about this song and that we have had a great journey together and I am privileged to continue on this path with you. So there's my thoughts for this week. Now I have a challenge for the 3 people that read on Tuesdays. Listen to the song,(have a giggle..it's cheesy) and take inventory in your relationship and find out something new about him or her. What are they interested in today? You know what they liked 5 years ago but people change. Grow with them. Ask and then listen. You might find out that you like the new same things. I don't usually make challenges but I feel if I can do it you can to. Good luck, and its cool to talk to your wife about what you feel so don't be a knot head. Instead, tell her.
Love,
Dave






Dear Dave,
I love it! I love the challenge. I love the song. I remember that day in Walnut Creek. I remember you having to explain the song a bit to me and then telling me to listen really carefully. I smiled really big when I got the lyrics! I love our 5 minutes or so in the room when you get home from work too. I also love you coming home from work around normal work ending hours....not just before the kids go to bed. It gives us so much more quality family time which helps for a healthier relationship between me and you. I love also that you have completely taken the initiative to help more at bedtime without me having to ask. I have to admit that because you had helped Blake all evening with all his potty needs...when it was time for him to go to bed and he pulled on my sleeve I was happy to jump up and tuck him into bed. I actually felt lucky instead of bothered. Thank you! Let's just keep on keeping on. We're on a roll! I'm off to go check out your cheesy video and sing with it at the top of my lungs. I don't even care if I wake the kiddos.

Love,
me


Dave is somewhat new to blogging so he thinks that the people that comment are the only people reading. He keeps saying no one likes our dear dave + april and I keep assuring him that I get plenty of emails {not comments} from grateful readers, plus it still is benefiting us so much...we are no where near quitting it. But this week I have a favor to ask.....can we show Dave some love here in the comments?! He checks for them on his phone all day long. ;) Let's keep him busy today. Thanks!!

One more thing...if you are local and missed my craft camp announcement....the post is here!
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67 comments:

  1. I love your dear Dave + April posts and look forward to them each week. I have not yet invited my husband to read them, but just might. They are so refreshing and such inspiring posts. Thank you for sharing that part of your lives.

    Happy day!

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  2. That song is the best! It reminds me of the movie "the Sweetest Thing" with Cameron Diaz, anyway I have never commented before, but I like reading your blog and your letter to each other, great idea and keep on keeping on!

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  3. I look forward to your Dear Dave + April posts every week, but I've never commented before.

    You give me hope.

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  4. I LOVE this series! I wish I could get my husband to do it. We are living in a house that we hate, in a state that we hate, and it is wreaking havoc on our marriage. We need something like this to bring us back into focus. Thanks for sharing this personal part of your lives with us.

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  5. i have really enjoyed this series too! my husband isn't this articulate, especially in writing things down, so I really admire Dave for being willing to put himself out there. I love this opportunity to connect with each other in a different way. and I especially love that you are so positive and encouraging to each other.
    xoxo,
    Amy

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  6. I am new to your blog... I don't usually comment. But I will oblige to your request. I like the idea of this post, and from what I have read in your blog I love the dynamics of your family! :)

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  7. Dave...you are amazing! Not alot of men would buy into the whole write letters to my wife every week - let alone put them on the internet. Thanks for showing how real men do it! I like that it doesn't sound like made up contrived mushy stuff either. It is just what is on a man's mind and I don't know about other women, but Words Of Affirmation is my Love Language and this makes my heart warm. If you haven't read about Love Languages you all should read it...its amazing how we can love better when we know how our partners need to be loved! Keep uo the good work.

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  8. Dave and April: I can't tell you how much I look forward to your letters to each other every week. My husband and I are married 6 years this week and even though we haven't really hit a rough patch yet (we're still kid-less and house-less and haven't had to do a lot of the really grown-up stuff yet), I still look forward to your weekly reminders to treat him in a way that shows him I don't take him for granted . . . because that is SO easy to do. So, keep writing! We'll keep reading. :)

    (Oh, and there's a book out there called "Remember the Sweet Things" that I think you'd both love. You should check it out.)

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  9. This idea is so cute! & I absolutely love this song!
    http://sweetteaserendipity.blogspot.com

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  10. Love these posts- it is such a great reminder to me to cherish my marriage and nurture my relationship with my husband! Thank you- both!

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  11. My husband and I don't have children, or crazy work hours, but I can totally see us in y'all. Sometimes you just get in a rut and it can be hard to battle back. Your love letters are a way to battle back - and they have been eye-opening and rewarding for your readers, too. So, thank you for sharing your lives, the intimate details, the every day.

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  12. Okay Dave - CHEESY!! But a great song and an even better challenge. I love that you both are willing to put yourselves out there because I know it has helped me take a look at my marriage, my actions, my words, etc. It has also helped me feel like I have gotten to know you two all over again and I love it! Greg was put in as Bishop in our ward on Sunday - YIKES! - and this will be especially applicable because time will be much more limited than it already was. You two are the best and I miss ya!!

    - Kami

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  13. P.S. - I usually read in silence, rarely leaving a comment so this was just for you April!! ;)

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  14. I *LOVE* that cheesy song, and it makes me smile if I ever hear it on the radio :)

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  15. As a newlyish wed (3 years in August) I'm very thankful for these! Married at 20 and 24 means we're growing up together. These help a lot! :)

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  16. Keep it up! This is my favorite weekly post because you guys keep it real with honesty and humor. I adore the way you open yourselves up and truly it helps the rest of us - at least it's helped myself and my hubby of 11 years! Thanks for sharing and please Dave - keep it up :)

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  17. I love Dear Dave and April!! Even though I'm a newcomer to the blog, I find this series very honest, raw, and open...refreshing in fact!

    I think a lot of people know the Pina Colada song, but don't actually KNOW know it. I remember actually listening to the lyrics one day, totally struck at how awesome the story is! If you don't listen carefully through to the end, you grow up thinking it's just about some guy cheating on his wife ;)

    Keep up the series guys!!

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  18. I dont ever comment but i LOVE reading your letters! Thanks for being so real

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  19. Okay, I never comment either - not ever sure what to say - but I do love reading the Tuesday letters and admire Dave for putting himself out there - not something my hubby would do, but it helps me see things from a guy's perspective (man, that's hard to do.. LOL!) and I understand him better because of it. So, there ARE more than 3 of us... LOL...and I guess we also need to show a little love!! :)

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  20. DAVE! I hope you're being kept very busy reading these today! We do love your letters to each other...it gives us all hope for our own relationships! It's nice to see that other people are having the same issues, struggles, awkwardness, and difficult days that we do. When my husband and I got married 12 years ago we were young and thought we were "too cool" to write the love letters to each other that our priest asked us to do in our pre-marital counseling. Looking back, I wish we hadn't made light of it...I now understand what a valuable tool he was teaching us to use.

    Keep on keeping on guys!

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  21. YES! Dave, we APPRECIATE your candor as a couple! It is VERY ENCOURAGING! I "follow" thru Google Reader and catch every post! Thank you both!

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  22. thank you sweet readers...so far. I knew you were the BESTEST! ♥ ♥

    xo + kisses, april

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  23. Sorry I'm not a commenter! I read the series EVERY WEEK! The hubs and I have yet to go through a relly tough time or a really huge fight, but through y'alls series we are trying to become closer to eachother by using some of the techniques that you guys use. We are trying to stay active in our marriage so that we can continue to grow and have a healthy marriage. I admire you both so much for putting this out there each week for all of the world to read. You have helped so many people and we cherish what you have done for us all. Thank you both!

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  24. Reading every week and give you both a lot of credit for putting it all out there and reminding the rest of us to stay actively engaged in our marriages!

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  25. Alright, I'll show some comment-love (because I only have our little family blog, but I know how it feels to think no one is reading because they won't comment)! I'm really new to the blog - don't remember how I stumbled across it, but I think it was linked to on another craft blog I read. Anyway, I remember that song and that I didn't really listen to the lyrics and understand them until I was older - maybe even after I was married. This was the first "Dear Dave + April" post I have read (again, very new to the blog) but I quite enjoyed it and may have to skim through the archives now! :)

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  26. I read every Tuesday. It really helps with insight and inspiration for my own marriage of 13 years. Thanks for doing this series. Thanks, Dave!

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  27. Long time reader/follower, first time commenting! (Just for Dave!!)
    I too follow your blog in Google Reader so that I NEVER miss a post. April, you are so talented and I love all your creative ideas.
    As a couple, you guys are amazing. What an inspiration and true definition of what marriage is really about! It's not always easy but if you work at it, it is very rewarding. I admire you both for being so honest with each other and for allowing the rest of us a peek into your lives and love story!!

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  28. Great song and love the series!! I read daily!

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  29. I read your "Dear Dave&April" every week, and I think it is great. To be honest, I am readsing yout blog every day. :)

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  30. I usually never comment..but even before I got to the end I was planning to post that The Pina Colada song is the best ever! I even had it as a ringtoen on my phoen for a while.

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  31. I was going to comment and then I saw that you already had 30 comments! Wowza... so I have nothing to ad except that I am reading.

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  32. Dear Dave,
    I met your wife in AZ in April. And I can only imagine that such an amazing woman is married to an equally amazing guy.

    BRAVO! To you for participating in April's blog. My husband just started doing that, and I think he's found that I REALLY appreciate it.

    I too (like some of the other commenters) wish that my husband would write things down more often. He says that it makes the rare times that he does write....more special. I say nice excuse, buster. :)

    Anyway, you deserve a TON of comments. Both for your fantastic Tuesday letters....AND for the fact that your wife is a ROCK STAR!

    Tell her HI from Lara! :)

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  33. 33 comments! Pow! ;)
    I will take that challenge. But I can't listen to the cheesy song. Its on the radio here all. the. time. Why is that? And I always mull over it when its on instead of turning it.

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  34. my husband and i are in our late twenties and have been married for five years now. he's in the army so we don't usually have time to get in a rut. we don't have kids yet but i still manage to stay ridiculously busy. i love the idea of writing letters. we don't do that much with all the technology available today. i try to do it when he's gone...but time always slips away.

    anywhoo...i was going to share something that i learned about him the other day. we've been trying to have a baby and while discussing it one day he told me that he wants to have a little girl. i always envisioned him as such a boy-person...out playing catch and watching sports and stuff. but who knew?! a girl! :)

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  35. I LOVE your Tuesday letters! As a newlywed it is so encouraging to hear from REAL people that are still working on their marriage after years and years..and loving it! Thank you for the encouragement. :)

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  36. I read every post and am a big fan of the blog, April's jewelry AND your marriage. :)

    Keep it up, DAVE!

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  37. I LOOOOVE the Dave + April series! One of the best ideas EVER! I love it so much that I mentioned it last week on my blog and linked it to yours! I'm thankful to know that we're all human and nobody has the perfect marriage. It makes me feel a bit better knowing we're all in the same boat and we can only keep trying to make things better! Thanks for your letters!!!

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  38. Love the Dear Dave and April series! And yes, I can't think of a cheesier song than this one, but it's a fun one with definite meaning behind it. And I love the challenge! My husband and I have a good relationship, but we still get busy and don't talk about "us" enough. I'll try harder!

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  39. Dear Dave, I read your blog weekly and love the Pina Colada song. You are right, those 5 minutes to catch up every day are crucial. I have been married 15 years to my best friend and we get up early, have coffee together every single day so we can talk. Your letters rock.

    Barbara

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  40. Oh that song...it cracks me up every time. But I do get what you are saying.

    Hi Dave! I'm reading along with all the others, good for you two for doing this.

    ps. Please don't mention the "makin' love at midnight" part. I don't think I could handle the cheese. ;)

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  41. HA! today we were talking about YOU, mr. kennedy! i told josh to not go back to work after lunch so he could start his vacation early but he said it wasn't possible because he had to finish a job for you. shoot, my plans of getting a few more hours of work out of him were foiled. so, thanks a lot for that! ;)

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  42. This series has helped me SO much! One of my must checks every week. Thank you!

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  43. So guilty of not commenting!!! I read the series! I've read every one of them. You two say such honest things about marriage... about real topics I don't hear anywhere else. You two are busting the myth that marriages are perfect and if they are not perfect then it wasn't meant to be. You guys make me feel normal. The weekly posts give me a constant reminder to work on what's most important. Love hearing from you two. The world needs "Dear Dave + April".

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  44. I read every week.
    I love it.
    I need it.

    Thanks so much for inspiring us readers to try a little harder!

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  45. Hi April and Dave! I read the series every week. Even "old people" can benefit from your wisdom. Hope to see you both soon. Love ya!

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  46. Hey Dave and April! I read your series every week. I appreciate that you and April have opened yourself up to all the couples out there and given us the opportunity to better our own marriages by your example. I was so inspired by this, that although I don't blog our letters back and forth, I did create a book that my husband and I pass back and forth, where we communicate with each other and grow closer to each other.
    Thank you! I pray you continued to be blessed in your marriage and that it becomes everything you dreamed it would be.

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  47. You two help so many. So there, Dave. You're sort of a big blogging deal. :D

    Well, and April, too. ;)

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  48. I have heard this song hundreds of times but never really listened. I am so glad you, Dave made me stop and listen, really listen. I read Dear Dave + April every week, I am so inspired by your relationship and the desire you both have to keep your relationship not only strong but fun as well.
    Keep up the hard work you two!

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  49. I think what you guys do is so sweet! Its nice to know that there are still good men out there!

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  50. Hi Dave and April, I love your blog and the Dave and April Tuesday series. I look forward to them each week. Even though my husband does not read along I have been trying to incorporate some of your ideas into our marriage. Thanks so much for all the great ideas. Much love from WV.

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  51. You guys I LOVE your Tuesday love notes, it totally makes my week. Please don't stop!

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  52. I'm a quiet reader too! There are plenty of us out there following this journey of yours.

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  53. I haven't been reading your blog for very long (maybe a month or so), but I went back and read the whole Dear Dave and April series.

    Thank you for being so open and honest. I'm getting married in 2 months, and everyone keeps saying that marriage is hard work. But no one ever says how it's hard or how to work at it. But through your letters, I've really begun to see what it takes to make a marriage work. You guys are the best.

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  54. Hey Dave...I just found April's Blog...more for the crafts etc...but this Tuesday thing is awesome...makes me want to work on my 27 yr old marriage more! Keep on Keeping on!

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  55. This whole post makes me smile. :)

    Keep it up lovebirds.

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  56. I read it every week but have never commented Dave, so you have lots of fans!

    My hubby and I have started to do this type of thing each week as well, a mushy, meaningful email to tell each other how much we love them, and what drives us nuts!

    Keep it up!

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  57. I recently added your blog to my Google Reader - so glad I did! And only today have I found the Dear Dave + April section... and LOVE it!
    I would love to do this same thing with my future husband, one day. I learn through writing, and this would be a really great way for me personally to express my thoughts, and also to read my husband's thoughts. To connect in this way (which not many couples would use) would be hugely beneficial for me. I will definitely keep it in mind :D
    In the meantime... I love learning from you! Thanks for sharing your journey :)

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  58. Thank you Dave for posting a song many have heard but never really "listened" to. A good reminder for those of us who have been in our relationships for a while. I enjoy reading the Tuesday letters. Hope you two will keep it up.

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  59. The love & tenderness is heartwarming.

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  60. HOLY MOLEY!!!!! Enough comments for you Dave????

    All I wanted to do was comment to say: Can you please clone Dave??? I close copy of him in my life :) ANd to do that I had to scroll through 60 some odd comments... yup. 3 readers alrighty...

    Love you guys! You both give me hope each Tuesday.... hope that some day Nat and Audrey will have an earthly father who treasures them and me, that there really are men like that out there. And double hope, because Blake is so like Nat...

    Hugs to the Kennedy Clan!

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  61. Dave- thank you for writing your letters to your beautiful wife! i love how God has brought the two of you together so sweetly and perfectly! He is good! It is such a blessing to read your sweet words to your wife... thank you!

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  62. I love the Dear Dave + April series! Keep up the great work, both of you! Sending love!

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  63. Hi Dave and April!
    LOVE this idea and LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this series! Thanks for putting it out there!

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  64. I love your Dave + April series and read every week. Hubby and I have been going through a rough patch ourselves, and I feel encouraged reading about how the two of you have improved your marriage... and I'm grateful you're willing to put yourselves out there to help others. Keep it up! I look forward to reading it!

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  65. Oh Dave and April - this series is GREAT! I am new to your blog but this is a feature that I am definitely loving. My hubbie have fallen into taken each other for granted - this is so good to read to remind me not to do that! THank you for sharing this part of your life with all of us!
    Maria

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  66. Dear Dave... I think you must be one of the coolest guys i know(well not really, but I feel like i know you) I think it is so great that you are doing this with your wife. I keep wanting to show this to my husband but I'm not sure he would be into it. I love the idea of letters to each other. You are so brave for putting yourself out there. Not many men would do so. So please keep these letters coming. I love to read them.

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I heart comments! Just one rule that I'm sure your momma taught you...if you don't have anything nice to say...please don't say anything at all!

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