Dear Dave + April....A Tuesday Series.

Dear Dave,
Three little words, when said with sincerity, can mean so much. I know I used to say I'm sorry almost in a curt manner to stop the conversation. To stop the argument. To pretend like you won or say it in a tone that I was sorry you couldn't 'get it' or understand what I was trying to say. Now I say all three words....'I AM SORRY'....so you know that I mean it. Sometimes I am quick to say I am sorry now. Not because I want to end the fight but because I recognize where it is going and what went wrong. I want to be able to continue to communicate. I want you to know that I care enough about 'us' to let go of my pride and admit the fault. I think that we used to be afraid to admit fault. That it would show a weakness. It would mean the other person won. But now, it means that 'we' are winning. I love that we are so comfortable now using those three little words. I love how I instantly melt when you say them to me. Knowing that individual pride is given up for the sake of strengthening our marriage.

I was sitting on Kaia's bed talking with her the other night. I asked her if she has noticed a difference in our marriage and how we treat each other. She smiled a really big, really sweet smile and said it was really nice in our home now. I told her it was her turn now to start talking nice to us! I promise we will survive these teenage years. I love you. And, I love that three months into these letter writings that we are still committed to making our marriage a happy, healthy, loving and respectful one.

Love, April

No letter from Dave this week. Next week for sure. I know he loves me, but I love getting his love letter too, so I'm not letting him off the hook that easy. Honestly, saying 'I am sorry' has changed the atmosphere in our home so much. Pride walks out the door, love and humility walk in. It reminds us that neither of us are better than the other. And, we are trying to be really respectful of accepting the other person's apology and softening while offering forgiveness. Sometimes, that's the harder part. We aren't ready to be done being mad, or we haven't gotten our point across yet, but the other person is offering that apology, wanting to move forward, not taking steps backwards. It's working for us. Three simple words with open and loving hearts that have the same goal in mind.

{If you are new to this series....check out the side bar for all of our posts...including the heart wrenching love letter from Dave to me that started our journey to a better marriage.}

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  1. I really appreciate these post, very honest and candid. I also love that you have that special relationship with your daughter and that she sees a difference in your relationship. That's love, love of your daughter, your family, yourself and your husband.

    Ok, ok, ok....you are officially my idol....betcha didn't know there was a wannabee in New Hampshire!

  2. yes, sorry is so hard to say...but why? it's so worth it.

  3. I think I'm in the saying sorry too much group. But you are right its all in how and when you say it. Great thoughts April!


I heart comments! Just one rule that I'm sure your momma taught you...if you don't have anything nice to say...please don't say anything at all!

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